


To Her Depths

by BridgetteIrish



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Additional Warnings will apply in future chapters, Angst with a Happy Ending, Chapters will be appropriately tagged, Dark!Kara, Drug Abuse, Drug Addiction, Drug Use, F/F, Supercat March Madness: Angst Week
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-28
Updated: 2016-05-08
Packaged: 2018-05-29 15:13:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6381442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BridgetteIrish/pseuds/BridgetteIrish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kara self-destructs.  This will be the story of how and why and how love saves her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is not a Sunny Danvers story.
> 
> An enormous thank you to reginalovesemma, who not only talked this story out with me, but has been a cheerleader and partner in making this Kara come to life. We believe she is important and we promise to save her.
> 
> Thanks also to my editors: reginalovesemma, rtarara, xxtorchxx, and stealthvag

The room was dark, curtains drawn. She couldn’t risk even a sliver of sunlight sneaking into the room. It was better in the dark—faster, harder.

She leaned against the bed, shaking slightly. Whether from the withdrawal or the stone clutched in her fist, she didn’t care. She would feel better in a minute.

She squeezed the green stone, which glowed just slightly in the dark room. Just enough to illuminate her fingers and part of the way up her wrist. She felt her powers ebb and the familiar ache start in her head and travel through her body. She squeezed again and watched the veins of her arm pulse green and she licked her lips in anticipation. 

The syringe was next to her on the floor. Her free hand grasped it blindly. It glowed faintly green as well, just enough to illuminate her face slightly as she pulled the plastic cover off with her teeth and spat it on the carpet.

She watched enraptured as she lowered the needle to the crook of her elbow, gave the kryptonite in her hand a final squeeze and watched the vein illuminate again. She slid the needle into the vein and bit her lip. There was no resistance, no steel skin, only the sweet sting of the needle and the rush as she pushed the plunger. She had cut the heroin with the last of her supply of liquid kryptonite, to ensure the high wouldn’t be forced out by her superior cells. If she could just feel normal, only for a moment. This would be the last time. 

The pain was instant, intense and delicious. She released a sigh and her head dropped against the side of her bed. Her hazy gaze landed on the carpet where her suit was crumpled in a strange mockery of her own position on the floor.

She could hear a faint banging from somewhere outside of herself, but couldn’t place it and didn’t want to. Her head dropped forward and her hair, tangled and dirty, covered her face. She allowed the pain to take over.

++++++++++++++++++

Cat Grant banged on the door of apartment 4D.

“Kara! Kara open this door right now. I know you’re in there!” She banged again. “Kara!”

She needed to get into that apartment. She dug in her purse and managed to find two long-forgotten hairpins leftover from a formal updo she’d worn weeks ago, to an event on the arm of the very woman trapped on the other side of that apartment door.

With the practice of a skilled burglar, she worked the tumblers and popped the lock inside of a minute and pushed the door open. “Kara!”

She ran through the apartment and made a beeline for the bedroom. The darkness was oppressive and the air heavy. She didn’t see anyone and worried for a moment that she had been wrong. That Kara wasn’t here and that she’d have to comb the city once again, looking under bridges and on top of buildings where she may or may not find Kara alive.

Then a small moan came from the other side of the bed. A breathy whisper. “Cat?”

Cat climbed over the bed and found Kara, in only her underwear, shaking and clutching herself around her middle. She took in the sight. The empty syringe on the floor, the green stone that had rolled from her fingertips, the suit crumpled in a ball. The broken girl turned wild, dilated eyes on her. “You came.” She winced against the pain then turned her head away and went very still.

“No. No no no no no no. Kara. No. Stay with me.” She lifted Kara from under her arms and dragged her, quickly as she could into the bathroom. Using all the strength she could muster she heaved her into the tub and turned on the cold water, letting the shower drench both Kara and herself. “Goddammit, Kara, this has got to stop.” Her warm tears mingled with the cold water as she pushed Kara’s hair out of her face. “Come back to me, sweet girl.”

Kara gasped for breath under the cold spray. She shivered as Cat turned off the water and found a large towel. Cat took her time drying her off and getting her out of the bra and panties she’d been wearing and into a simple nightshirt. It took her a full ten minutes to get Kara back onto the bed, tucked under warm covers before Cat removed her own wet clothes and put on a pair of Kara’s flannel pajamas. They smelled like old Kara, like vanilla and laundry detergent and a hint of sunshine. She breathed in the scent and let fresh tears come. She sat on the edge of the bed and just watched for a moment, pulling one of Kara’s hands into her own. She couldn’t resist a gentle stroke of Kara’s hair and a kiss to her forehead. “How will I ever get you back from this?”

Kara’s breathing was shallow and labored. Her fingernails were clawing at her own forearms and she was still shaking. This was worse than the bridge. Kara had crossed a new line this time and she was in danger. She’d gone too far. Cat knew she was in over her head, so she made the phone call she had promised she would make.

“Alex, it’s Cat. I found her.” She choked back a sob. “Her place. It’s bad.”

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Six Months Earlier

“You look beautiful.” Kara blushed and looked away. “Sorry, Miss Grant,” she giggled. “I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable, but it’s true.” She flashed her a sunny smile.

Cat smirked. “Never apologize for giving a compliment, Kara. Thank you. You look quite striking yourself tonight.”

Kara tugged at the neckline and hemline of her dress a bit. “You picked it out, Miss Grant.”

Cat stepped forward and reached out to straighten a spaghetti strap that wasn’t out of place. “But you wear it so very well.”

These moments between them were becoming more frequent. One of them would step into the other’s personal space. The air around them would become heavy with want and anticipation and it became a game to see who would step away first. Maybe tonight was the night one of them would step forward, instead of back.

This time it was Kara who stepped away. She regretted it almost immediately. It would only take a moment of bravery and she could have the world. She read the disappointment in Cat’s eyes. The sparkle there that told her she wouldn’t be rejected. Her courage had failed her again. She had failed Cat again. She shook her head and picked up her clutch where it was laying on the coffee table in Cat’s office. Cat had turned away from her and she almost followed her to the desk. “Are you ready to go?” She managed to choke out, her feet glued to the floor. “The limo is out front. We don’t want you to be late.”

Cat picked up her own clutch, giving it a hard squeeze as she willed her heart to slow. She pulled out a compact to check her lipstick one last time. It was a childish distraction, she knew, but she needed the distance at the moment. “You could just fly me there, you know.”

Kara laughed. “There are two reasons that is a bad idea. One, it would destroy both your makeup and your hair.” She registered the itch in her fingers to fix the errant curl at Cat’s temple, but resisted stepping into her space again. “Two, I am attending as your assistant tonight, remember? Just plain Kara Danvers.”

Cat snapped the compact shut and remarked flippantly, “There’s nothing plain about you, dear.”

Kara’s breath caught and she pretended to check something important on her phone. “We should go.”

Cat nodded and breezed past Kara to her private elevator. Kara breathed in Cat’s spicy, earthy scent. CK Be mixed with some sort of herbal hair product. It made Kara feel like she could fly with or without her powers.

“Coming, Kara?” She held the door of the private elevator open and tilted her head innocently. Kara moved toward her like a moth to a flame.

+++++++++++++++

Three grueling hours later, Cat looked ready to fall off her four-inch heels and Kara felt as though she’d exhausted her powers trying to save her from awkward conversations and wandering hands all evening. The way the men in the room not only watched Cat, but attempted to paw her had made Kara edgy and irrationally jealous. She was moody and quiet and Cat was surprisingly sober and tired.

They poured themselves into the limo and as they made their way through the streets of National City, Kara watched out the window as Cat watched Kara, listening to the sounds of the city that stretched beyond their view. Cat’s voice drew her attention back inside the car. “You conducted yourself gallantly tonight, Kara. Always at my rescue just when I needed you.”

Kara was feeling brave and sad and her usual shy filter seemed to have left her. “I didn’t like the way they looked at you.” She met Cat’s eyes fleetingly, before focusing back out the window.

Cat slid across the seat and allowed her hip to brush against Kara’s and their shoulder’s met slightly. She desperately wanted to press herself against Kara’s warmth, but needed the girl’s permission first. “I liked the way you looked at me.”

Kara’s head whipped around to find Cat’s lips inches from her own. She took a deep breath, but didn’t back away, they way one of them always had. Instead she leaned in and pressed her lips to Cat’s, tasting a hint of sweet vermouth and neutral tang of lipstick. Needing more, she parted her lips and allowed Cat’s tongue to meet her own and brought a hand up to cup Cat’s jaw, her thumb gently stroking a soft cheek. The kiss lasted both forever and a split second, and soon the limo slowed and pulled up in front of Cat’s building.

“Come up,” Cat offered.

Kara closed her eyes and sighed. “Be sure, Cat.” She opened her eyes again. “I still work for you and you’ll destroy me if you aren’t. So, please, be sure.”

“I’m sure.”

Kara kissed her again, popped open the door and assisted Cat from the car, slinging a strong arm around her waist as she guided her into the building.


	2. Make It Hurt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bad fight and a lost life. Kara attempts to cope.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to reginalovesemma for all of the help with creating this world.
> 
> Also, thank you to reginalovesemma and writerstealth for the fantastic edits.

Previously:

_Cat slid across the seat and allowed her hip to brush against Kara’s and their shoulder’s met slightly. She desperately wanted to press herself against Kara’s warmth, but needed the girl’s permission first. “I liked the way you looked at me.”_

_Kara’s head whipped around to find Cat’s lips inches from her own. She took a deep breath, but didn’t back away, they way one of them always had. Instead she leaned in and pressed her lips to Cat’s, tasting a hint of sweet vermouth and neutral tang of lipstick. Needing more, she parted her lips and allowed Cat’s tongue to meet her own and brought a hand up to cup Cat’s jaw, her thumb gently stroking a soft cheek. The kiss lasted both forever and a split second, and soon the limo slowed and pulled up in front of Cat’s building._

_“Come up,” Cat offered._

_Kara closed her eyes and sighed. “Be sure, Cat.” She opened her eyes again. “I still work for you and you’ll destroy me if you aren’t. So, please, be sure.”_

_“I’m sure.”_

_Kara kissed her again, popped open the door and assisted Cat from the car, slinging a strong arm around her waist as she guided her into the building._

 

 

Four Months Later

 

“Fuck.  Kara.  Yes!”

 

With one hand on the headboard and one buried in Kara’s hair, Cat could feel her orgasm building.  Kara’s hands were wrapped around her thighs, which were quivering on either side of Kara’s head.  

 

“Jesus, I’m so close.”

 

Kara groaned and slid a hand up Cat’s stomach to pinch an erect nipple.  Her tongue sped up and Cat arched and rolled her hips.

 

She screamed and the headboard shook.  Kara’s phone rang from the nightstand.  

 

“No,” Cat whined as she rode Kara harder.

 

Kara shook her head, which elicited a squeal from Cat.  “It’s Alex,” she whispered into Cat’s clit.  “She can wait two minutes.  Come for me, Cat.”

 

Cat groaned again.  “Supergirl…”

 

Kara pressed two fingers into Cat and met her eyes from below.  “Will save the day, in a minute.”  She smiled wickedly.  “But I like it when you call me Supergirl.”  She chuckled and vibrated her tongue against Cat’s clit again.

 

Cat bucked, screamed, came and went boneless in Kara’s arms.  Kara dragged her down and met her lips.  She held Cat close and reached for her phone, dialing the number as Cat panted into her collarbone and brushed her lips against her shoulder.

 

She spoke a bit breathlessly.  “Alex?  What’s up?.... None of your business….” She smiled.  “I’ll be right there.”

 

Before Cat could even sit up, Kara was dressed in her suit and drawing her into a heated kiss.  “I’ll be home soon.  I love you.”  And she was gone.

 

“I love you too.”  Cat whispered to the empty room.

 

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

 

The flight to the beach location Alex had given her was short and fast.  Alex poured details into her ear as she flew.  She had little time to think about what awaited her or prepare for what was ahead.  It was her favorite way to work, instinctual, improvisational, impulsive, eighty-percent chance of punching.  She set her jaw and sped forward. 

 

She arrived to a DEO helicopter hovering above.  The lights from the boardwalk a couple hundred yards away threw eerie shadows on the sand.

 

Kara landed and looked around.  “What am I looking for, Alex?”

 

“He disappeared a couple of seconds ago.  He went straight up about ten yards south of where you’re standing.  We lost track of him when he cleared cloud cover.  One of Non’s guys, I think.  Hang tight, Supergirl.  I don’t think this is over.”

 

Without warning the sound of crunching steel and surprised shouts rang out across the sky and Kara was in the air in the blink of an eye.  Something had impacted the helicopter with enough force to bend the rotors and knock it from the sky.  She lowered the helicopter to the ground and DEO agents scurried into formation on the sand.  

 

Kara was slammed from behind by a large figure in a dark jumpsuit.  They tumbled into the surf, a bundle of kicks and punches.  Kara got the upper hand and pinned the young alien to the ground.  She lifted her fist to deliver her final blow, just strong enough to knock him out and get him contained.

 

But he laughed and winked.  “Gonna hit me, Kara Zor-El?  You wouldn’t harm your betrothed, would you?”  

 

“My what?”

 

“Don’t you recognize me, Kara?  We were promised to each other, before we lost Krypton.”  His eyes softened and so did Kara’s fist.

 

Kara shook her head.  “Ben-An?”  She stood up and he followed.  “M-mother told me you were killed, that you joined my aunt and uncle’s cause and that you were killed before…”  She felt tears prick her eyes.  

 

He began to circle her, but Kara didn’t care.  Her guard was entirely down.  She’d been betrothed to this boy since the day she had learned to walk.  They had spent hours planning their lives while painting and practicing their Klurkor forms.

 

He laughed dryly.  “Your mother put me in that wretched prison, Supergirl.”  He spat the name as though it left a rotten taste in his mouth.  “I was a child.  She took my childhood, my future.”  He placed a strong hand on her shoulder and whispered evilly in her ear.  “She took you from me too.”  The caress on her cheek would have been comforting from the fourteen-year-old boy she’d known on Krypton.  From this angry young man, it sent shivers through her bones.

 

“Ben.  Whatever you’re doing with Non.  You don’t have to anymore.  You can come with me.  You can be a part of this world.”

 

Ben-An’s laugh echoed across the beach and he took off into the sky.

 

Kara took off after him, but lost track of him in seconds.  She landed back on the beach and cocked her head, listening for something, anything that could tell her where he had gone.

 

A slam against her shoulder and a pained cry from Alex drew her attention to the wreckage just beyond the beach.

 

Ben had Alex pressed against the wrecked copter before Kara’s boots had left the sand.  “Non tells me this is your Earth-sister, Kara.  Tell me, will you put as much effort into saving her as your mother did into saving Krypton?”  He squeezed and the choked sob that came from Alex spurred Kara into action.

 

A thousand memories of Ben flew through Kara’s mind in a second, but the memory of the last time she saw him lingered, only for a moment.

 

__________

 

_ “Happy Day, Ben.”  Kara said shyly as her friend tossed her a ball across her living room. _

 

_ “Happy Day, Kara.”  His handsome, shy smile made Kara flush warmly as she caught the ball, but she recognized the darkness, the worry behind his usually carefree grin. _

 

_ “What’s wrong?”  She pulled him by the hand and drew him to a seat next to the window. _

 

_ “Kara, you know our life together has been planned from your naming day.  And from the second we met, I have looked forward to the day that we will be joined together under Rao’s light.”  Kara smiled at his romantic dramatics and squeezed his hand, giving him the courage to continue.  “That day… is not to be…”  He looked down at their joined hands and Kara gasped. _

 

_ “What?  Ben, of course it will.  It was prophesied.  Rao decreed it.” _

 

_ “No, Kara.  In a matter of months, there will be no Rao, no Krypton, no prophesy.” _

 

_ She looked at him incredulously. _

 

_ “I’ve been training with your Uncle Non and Aunt Astra.  There are… plans being made.  They think they can save Krypton, but it’s going to be… difficult.  I could get in trouble, Kara.  I just want you to know that it’s nothing against you.  Your mother, she…” _

 

_ “No! Ben.  No!  You can’t do this.  I know Mother and Aunt Astra have been fighting.  I know Aunt Astra thinks that her way is the only way to save Krypton, but you have no part in this!  Krypton will be fine.  It will.  My father says so and he works at the Science Academy.” _

 

_ Ben shook his head.  “No, Kara.  Krypton is dying.  I’ve joined the side that can save it.”  His face softened as tears gathered in her eyes.  “That may mean giving you up.”  Kara pressed her lips together, willing herself not to cry.  “You’ll survive this, Kara.  You’re strong.  And your parents will save you.  I… may not survive.  And even if I do, I may be punished for my role.  In any case, I won’t be in a position to care for you, the way a husband should.” _

 

_ Tears rolled down Kara’s cheeks.  “Don’t do this, Ben.  Please.  Come talk to my parents.  I can save you too.”  He shook his head and squeezed her hands.  “Please.” _

 

_ Ben shifted closer to her and lifted one hand to her cheek, wiping her tears.  “I’m sorry, Kara.”  Their eyes met, then their foreheads.  Ben drew their faces close.  He laid a chaste kiss on Kara’s open lips.  She kissed back, just for a moment and when she opened her eyes to meet Ben’s, his face was steely.  “I have to go.” _

 

_ Kara buried her face in her hands when he was gone.  That was where her father found her later that day, after she had cried herself to sleep. _

 

_______________________

 

Kara shook the memory of her first kiss from her mind.

 

Ben-An’s hand squeezed a little tighter on Alex’s throat.  

 

It took less than a second for Kara to register the choked sounds coming from Alex.  Her hands clawed at the much stronger ones clamped around her neck,and as the light dimmed from Alex’s eyes, rage poured through Kara.  Rage for the loss of the little boy from Krypton that she could have loved, rage for what that boy was now doing to her sister; the strong daughter of this adoptive planet that that boy is trying to destroy.

 

There was no decision, no thought, only action.  She flew forward and yanked Ben back from Alex by his hair using all of her strength.  He reeled back, releasing his hold on Alex.  She collapsed into the surf.  She tightened her grip on Ben’s hair and brought her other hand up to bring him around to face her.  The power in her hands, coupled with her scream of rage, broke Kara’s usually iron control.  She heard the snap and Ben fell to the surf in a heap as Kara rushed to Alex.  “I’ve got you, sis.”

 

“Supergirl,” Agent Vasquez got her attention where she kneeled in the surf next to Ben-An.  “He’s dead.”

 

++++++++++++++++++++++

 

Alex shoved a sobbing, trembling Kara into the sparring ring.  They both knew Kara could shake her off if she wanted to, but all the fight had gone out of her.  She sat on the floor with her back against one of the Kryptonite emitters.  They weren’t on, but in that moment, a piece of Kara wished they were.  She wished for that twinge of pain, of hurt, and penance or punishment for the choice she made today.  He was dead.  She could have saved him, so long ago, but he was dead.

 

She didn’t regret it.  She couldn’t.  Alex was here, alive.  She’d do it again, and that knowledge ate at her psyche.  She would choose her sister over him every time.  

 

That truth alone made her a failure.

 

She barely heard Alex’s rant as she tried desperately to comfort her sister..

 

“You did what you had to do, Kara.  I’m sorry he’s gone, but he’s trying to kill everyone on this planet, not just me.”

 

She shook her head and buried it in her arms.  “I wish I could say it was for the greater good, Alex.  But it was about you.  I had to save you.  I had to.”  Her tears started again in earnest when she thought of the consequences of her choice tonight.

 

Alex kneeled in front of Kara and lifted her chin.  “Your job isn’t to save me.”  Tears shined in Alex’s eyes.  “I accepted all the risks that came with this job.  I know, every morning when I get out of bed, that this day could be the day I won’t be coming home.  I made peace with that a long time ago.”  She bowed her head.  “I’m sorry I never prepared you for that possibility.”

 

Kara’s head dropped again.  “Are you sure he’s gone?”

 

Alex nodded.  “I’m sorry, Kara.”  She took Kara’s hand.  “You can’t save everyone.  You made a split second decision, today.  Please don’t blame yourself.”

 

Kara curled further into herself.  “No.  No, it’s my fault.  If I had gotten there sooner, been faster, stronger.  I killed him, but, Alex… I had to choose you.  Don’t you get it?  I had to choose you.”

 

Alex sighed heavily.  “Look, Kara, I know you knew him on Krypton, but how is he different from any of the others?”

 

Kara’s breath caught in her throat.  She knew Alex wouldn’t understand.  “He… was my betrothed.”  She looked at her hands and continued.  “If Krypton hadn’t…” she cleared her throat.  “We’d probably have a houseful of little Ben-Ans and Karas learning Klurkor and making crooked-winged angels of their own.”  She sounded nostalgic and sad.  “He made some bad decisions and he believed in some things that tore us apart.  He was flawed.”  She sniffed and wiped her eyes.  “But he was mine.  My mother told me he died before Krypton was destroyed.  I had already mourned him.”

 

Alex nodded.  They sat in silence for another few minutes, Kara’s thoughts slowing down and exhaustion settling in.

 

“Can I ask you something?”

 

Kara nodded.

 

“Why didn’t you answer your phone right away tonight?  You never screen my calls.”

 

Another wave of guilt and another tear spilled down her cheek.  When she spoke, her voice almost died in the space between them, she spoke so quietly.  “I was… with Cat.”

 

+++++++++++++++++

 

The slam of the door echoed through the sparring ring.  Kara stood in the middle of the room and watched Alex go.  She’d never seen her this angry.

 

Alex had never accepted Cat’s place in her life.  She resented the missed tv nights, the aborted Saturday outings, the occasional news story featuring grainy photos of Cat Grant canoodling with her assistant.  She warned Kara of the danger of exposure, of Cat’s power to ruin her, of all the wretched things Cat had said to her over the years.  No matter how much Kara begged, or cried, or shouted at Alex to understand that it was so much more than a torrid affair, it always ended like this, with Kara standing in an empty room, watching Alex slam a door between them.

 

If there was ever a time she needed her sister, it was now.  Everytime she felt Krypton within her grasp, it slipped away from her again.  First Kal-El, then Astra, now Ben-An.  All the people she had once loved, died or outgrew her or grew to hate her and now one was murdered… by her own hands.

 

The rage and pain struck her like a physical blow.

 

She screamed and pounded a fist into the wall of the room, next to the control panel.  She stared at the panel and with one shaky hand flipped the switch to turn on the kryptonite emitters.  She felt the nausea, the ache immediately.  It was always like this the first few seconds.  The pain would typically subside in time to spar with Alex.  As her stomach settled and her bones stopped vibrating, she turned the dial.  The green in the room brightened.  It stung and she breathed through the pain.  She deserved this.  She needed it.  The punishment would never be enough, but it was something.

 

Another turn of the dial and she felt her powers drain.  The weight of the world lifted and the pounding in her chest drowned out the screaming in her head.  She clutched her chest and tried to take a deep breath.

 

With a glare of anger at the panel, she turned the dial up again and cried out.  Her head ached and she trembled against the desire to vomit.

 

Kara fell to her knees and remained there for several agonizing minutes, soaking in the pain, feeling the poison seep into her skin.  It pulsed like a heartbeat with each breath.  She didn’t want to like it, but each pulse was another responsibility dropped to the floor.  It drained her of power and all of the burdens that came with it.   Her jaw dropped and her breath shook and her fingernails clawed at the floor.  She pressed her head to the floor between her hands and ground out a sob between clenched teeth.

 

A terrified gasp brought her to her feet.

 

She slammed the switch off and stumbled from the room.

 

++++++++++++++++

 

The key trembled as she tried to unlock the door to Cat’s penthouse.  Kara hated keys.  She rarely used them.  Her apartment had the bay window, Cat’s the balcony.  She was more comfortable in flight.

 

Her bones still ached and she still felt weak and relieved.  She needed Cat, while she still felt this.  While Cat could still punish her.  The door gave way and she slammed it behind her, falling against it with a grunt.

 

Cat rushed into the room holding a Louisville slugger and a sneer.  It fell to the floor at the sight of Kara shaking against the door.  “Kara, what - ?”

 

Kara smiled and shoved herself in Cat’s direction.  She placed weak hands on Cat’s hips and guided her against the opposite wall by sheer momentum.  She placed a loving kiss on Cat’s lips and met her steely gaze.  “Tie me up, Cat.  Now, before it wears off.”

 

Cat watched, confused and scared as Kara’s wild eyes flew across her face.  In the dark they seemed to glow, not with Kara’s usually sunny blue, but a dull acidic green that made Cat’s stomach roil menacingly.  “Darling, what happened?”

 

She shook her long tresses as though trying to clear her mind.  “Mmm.  Kryptonite.  For once, you’re stronger than I am, Cat.  Don’t you want to take advantage of me?”  Her smile was menacing and dark.  She kissed Cat again, growling and pressing against her desperately.  Cat pulled away and placed a hand against Kara’s clammy cheek, she swore she saw a pulse of green beneath the pallid skin, but the moonlight in the room was casting shadows and she couldn’t be sure what was real.    

 

Cat guided Kara, stumbling and weak into the bedroom by her hips and laid her in the center of the bed.

 

Kara spread her arms wide against the slats of the headboard as though already tethered to it.  “Last chance, Cat.  I’m powerless and begging.  Don’t you want me?”  Her eyes were getting heavy and her head lolled a bit, her breathing labored.

 

Cat shook her head, sadness coloring her gaze.  “Kara… No”

 

Kara’s mind raced, her shame flooded her mind and she could only think of how desperately she needed the physical pain to outweigh the emotional.  Alex was ashamed of her, now Cat, soon her Aunt Astra would hear about what she’d done and she’d be ashamed too.  “No, please.  I’m asking for it.  Make it hurt, Cat.  I need it.  I need you.”  She knocked her wrists against the headboard in a silent plea.     

 

Cat reached out and folded Kara’s arms gently across her stomach.  She pulled the covers up to try to infuse some warmth into the trembling girl.  Kara felt small and weak in her arms, terrifyingly so.  “Not like this, sweet girl. We’ll talk in the morning.”

 

Kara sobbed and raked her fingernails across her forearms in a vain attempt to inflict pain, but she was weak and her body was giving in to sickness and fatigue. “No,” she mumbled.  “My fault.  My fault.  My fault.  I’m sorry.”   

  
Lost and scared, Cat laid down next to the shaking girl and pulled her hands softly through Kara’s disheveled hair.  “Sleep.”


End file.
